I want to leave home or my family / relatives have asked me to leave

The information below is not age specific and can relate to anyone of any age living at home with family or other relatives.

Staying in the family home

As you grow up, it is natural that you will not always see eye to eye with your parents or guardians. These disagreements can often stem from a lack of understanding of each other’s lives and behaviour. It is better if you try and sort things out. Explain how you feel and listen to what they have to say.

Set some ground rules

Sometimes you may feel that your parents make all of the rules and you have to choose to obey them or break them. As you grow up, it is important that you and your parents set ground rules together and make decisions that you all find acceptable.

These decisions may be on issues such as:

  • privacy and personal space
  • when and how often you go out
  • how much you help around the house

Try to negotiate rather than argue, and be prepared to compromise.

If you are having problems communicating with your parents, it may help to talk to someone else. This could be an elder brother or sister, your grandparents, aunt or uncle, a friend or teacher. They may be able to act as a go between, to help smooth things over with your parents.

Can my parents/relatives kick me out?

Most family disagreements can be sorted out through communication and, in some cases, mediation. However, sometimes it is not possible to stay at home as you may not feel safe or your parents may have said that you have to leave. The Homelessness Prevention Team will do what they can to try and get you back home, where it is safe to do so, and if necessary provide support to help you and your family.

The Wallich Conflict Resolution Service can also provide support by working primarily with people inconflicts that threaten their housing. The Wallich use mediation to assist people in resolving conflict byseeking solutions that are acceptable to everyone. For more information, contact them on 01745 345500.

The reality of leaving home

If you are thinking of leaving home due to stress with your family, it may help to stop and think of the reality of leaving home first. You may think it means:

  • your own flat
  • doing what you want, when you want
  • no rules
  • nobody telling you what to do

The reality is likely to be:

  • may be difficult to find somewhere to live
  • may have to share accommodation
  • you will have lots of new responsibilities, such as paying rent and cooking
  • you will have limited income and may find it hard to afford to do things you enjoy

If you are aged 16 or 17 years of age

If you have been asked to leave by family and you are aged 16 or 17 years, you can contact the Homelessness Prevention Team for some help.